In 2025, the U.S. economy is throwing curveballs like it’s trying out for the Yankees, but America’s biggest corporations are acting like it’s just another Monday. Why the hush-hush? Let’s decode the silence, fact-check the spin, and throw in some data that even your conspiracy-theorist uncle can’t argue with.
Jerome Powell hasn’t made a peep this August, which means either the economy is finally behaving or he’s trapped in a spreadsheet somewhere. Here’s a satirical look at what happens when the Federal Reserve goes radio silent—and why that’s both comforting and terrifying.
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