Hack Attack in the DMV

Cybersecurity threats are surging, and hackers are targeting everything from hospitals to your grandma’s Wi-Fi. Washington D.C. is beefing up defenses, which is ironic because Congress still uses ‘password123.’

Ransomware attacks have hit local infrastructure. Experts say it’s serious, but let’s be honest—if hackers really wanted chaos, they’d just delete everyone’s Netflix history.

Comedy Bits:

• Hackers demanding Bitcoin from people who still write checks.
• DMV officials Googling ‘how to stop hackers’ during a briefing.

If hackers can shut down pipelines, maybe they can fix Metro escalators.