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Bitcoin Surges Past $45K: DMV Traders Panic-Buy Avocado Toast Futures

Bitcoin is back, and so is your cousin who swore he was done with NFTs. #CryptoChaos #BitcoinSurge #DMVFinance

Avatar photo Nkahoot 1 month ago 0 7

Bitcoin soared past $45,000 today, and DMV traders are losing their minds. According to CoinDesk (https://www.coindesk.com/markets/2025/12/01/bitcoin-price-hits-45k), the surge follows rumors of SEC easing crypto regulations. DMV investors are Googling “how to mine Bitcoin from a Tesla.”

Local coffee shops in Bethesda report record avocado toast orders. Arlington tech bros pitch blockchain brunch apps. Georgetown influencers post “How to look rich without being rich” TikToks.

**Why It Matters**
Crypto volatility impacts DMV startups and freelancers. Institutional investors remain cautious, per Bloomberg (https://www.bloomberg.com/crypto).

**Fact Check**
– Bitcoin price confirmed by CoinTelegraph (https://cointelegraph.com/news/bitcoin-price-hits-45k).
– SEC rumors from Bloomberg.

**Closing Punchline**
If Bitcoin crashes again, at least brunch will still be delicious.

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